...there will be a dawn.

[v.1]
the lights go out all around me
one last candle to keep out the night
and then the darkness surrounds me
i know i'm alive, but i feel like i've died

and all thats left is to accept that its over
my dreams ran like sand through the fist
that i made
i try to keep warm, but i just grow colder
I feel like i'm slipping away....

[chorus]
After all this has passed...
I still will remain.
After i've cried my last...
there'll be beauty from pain
Though it won't be today,
someday i'll hope again,
and there'll be beauty from pain.
you will bring beauty from pain.

[v.2]
my whole world is the pain inside me.
the best i can do is just get through the day.
when life before is only a memory
i wonder why God lets me walk through this place

and though i can't understand why this happened,
i know that I will when i look back someday.
and see how You brought beauty from ashes
and made me as gold purified through these flames.

[bridge]
here i am, at the end of me
trying to hold to what i can't see.
i forgot how to hope, this night's been so long
i cling to Your promise...
there will be a dawn.

[beauty from pain-superchick]

xoxo

Faith of our Fathers.

I am at school. so what else is new... I have a midterm this afternoon and I am SO ready for it. It is in history. Have I told you blog-reading populous how much history fascinates me? Well, allow me...please, do.

I <3 history. American history mostly. Our country is SO amazing. I don't know how many of you listened to Obama's acceptance speech last night, and as far as speeches go, it was a pretty swell one [someone should hire me his ghostwriter for my next speech class]. anyways, I was particularly struck by a part where he was talking about a voter in the south who was 106 years old. and he mentioned all the changes she'd seen our country go through. it was so amazing to me. i actually got chills listening to it. [this does not mean i'm an Obama supporter, he just gives good speeches.]
But I realized how rich our country is. Sad, deteriorating, full of sin and sinners, with more debt than Bill Gates has money...but still pretty rich. And we can read all about what makes our country great in any text book. But I think the most amazing thing is when we can sit down and hear first-hand accounts from people who have lived through the events that have shaped and molded us.

segway.

I had an pretty terrific experience the other day, following this same flow-ish. I had gotten home from school and this elderly man was out in his bright red motorized scooter taking a little jaunt around the block. he stopped in front of my driveway and in my head i was thinking, "I hope he doesn't want to talk...I just want to go inside and sleep." But he looked at me and asked me if anyone in my house knew a man named Bill White* [*last name changed to protect the innocent]. When I informed him that not only did we know him, but he is my great-uncle, I could tell he was pretty excited. He proceeded to tell me that he worked with Bill and they were good buddies. He spent the next twenty minutes re-living the good old days when him and Bill would eat pie and share a cup of coffee when they had good days and bad. I was now instantly fascinated by this talking history book right in front of me. I also felt ashamed of my attitude earlier. The man's name was Gene, and he knew he was going to die soon and wanted to see Bill before he passed away. Both men are very old and sick and with Bill living a good 45 min. away, the chances of them seeing eachother were slim. But Gene still asked me to give Bill his phone number and address and see if we could work something out.
The very next sunday, my mom was having potluck and who was coming over but Bill and his family. I had hoped Gene would be around, but couldn't get in contact with him. That afternoon, I was upstairs studying and my mom calls me down. Turns out, Gene had been riding by on his scooter and my mom stopped him to see if it was the same man. And at that same moment, Bill was driving down the street with his daughter. The reunion of the two was joyous and brought a tear to my eye.
Here is a picture of the two men:

Both Bill and Gene are men of God and I am continually amazed at how true the Scripture is when it says that the older should teach the younger because of their wisdom. Listening to them talk and share of their lives gone by and their hope for their eternity with Jesus is inspiring and makes living life all the more worth it.
There are so many of these people in the world, who have lived life and have learned hard and valuable things from it. I challenge you, as well as myself, no matter our age, to take advantage of those around us who have been there and done that. It wasn't on a whim that God allowed overlapping generations. This was on purpose. So lets grab the proverbial bull by the horns and dig a bit deeper into the mysteries of life by hearing firsthand experiences.
Sorry this one was a bit wordy =] enjoy.

xoxo

hmm. who would have thought.

So i guess this means I get to do random questions as well! YAY ME! There's supposed to be seven. but shhh i'm gonna sneak one in before i share my random seven... ok, here it is. ready? i love...let me emphasize, LOVE answering random questions.

Ok.

Tidbit #1: I read, re-read and re-re-read books. [up to like four "re-'s"] i just get so much more out of them the second, third, fourth and fifth times i read them. Some books are just worth it. I never get tired of them. I love the characters, the story and everything else about them.

Tidbit #2: as much as i love sunshine, i LOVE rain and cloudy days and wind. It makes me want to curl up in bed and just listen to the rain. I love bundling up and wearing jackets and scarves and gloves. [even though we don't normally EVER get to that point in california...this is why I have farmed out my brothers to REALLY cold areas of the country. they thought it was for their job or their wives jobs...but no. its a conspiracy. i did it. just to satisfy my cold-weather fettish]

Tidbit #3: I dislike a lot of things "normal" girls are supposed to like. and in WHAT rule-book do we find this? i don't like chocolate, shopping, shoes, decorating, etc...

Tidbit #4: i could go to work at a restaurant for the rest of my life and never EVER go back to school. and be totally and completely ok with that.

Tidbit #5: i hate walking up stairs one at a time. i always skip one. Because...well...its not cuz my legs are long. mostly because it goes faster. and is less tedious. i don't know. and when i go down stairs, i tend to not step on the last three...i just sort of jump.

Tidbit #6: As much as i wish i had grown up with sisters, I am glad i didn't. i love my brothers. And now i just get rad sister-in-laws to do all the fun grown-up girl stuff with. and we don't even have all that sibling stuff to get in the way! YAY!

Tidbit #7: sometimes i talk in text-message language. I'll say "brb" [be right back], "idk" [i don't know], "btw" [by the way] and some other ones. it bothers people. it bothers me. but, but it just sort of happens. maybe i should to to TA [Texters Anonymous].

So now you know! and don't you For-GET- IT!
<3