we are a culture that is looking for approval everywhere we go. (and yes, i am a part of this too!) We make blanket statements about things as if they are fact. And whoever sees differently than us is just messed up, or has no sense of music or style or food or isn't a true Christian even.
and then people try to be different and against the norms. and they end up banding together in being different. because no one can stand alone. it is all about looking around and making yourself feel better because you're not the only one. being the only one who holds one opinion is lonely.
but this is just for the trivial things, right?
wrong.
because we don't stop with opinions on music or actors or food.
we do this with people's lives, standards, character, beliefs etc...
"Tattoos are wrong no matter who you are."
or
"Well if I don't believe dancing is right, then it isn't right for anyone."
or
"Anyone who attends that event isn't a Christian."
or
"She isn't raising her children right."
And in these cases, it isn't about standing alone or being right, it is about understanding the journey and being a journeyer.
Maybe the tattoo came from a Jewish Prison camp during WWII.
Maybe dance is a form of worship and art for someone.
Maybe the person attending that questionable event is struggling to find their identity in Christ and being there will cause them to re-evaluate.
Maybe she was beaten and abused and has no way of knowing how to raise children right.
who knows?
anybody who has spent any amount of time having a relatively deep conversation with me knows one of the principles I stand by is this:
Everyone is on a journey. No two journeys look the same. Since only you and God know exactly where you're at in your journey, I cannot possibly judge you for not being at the same place I am at.
but we do it. notice I said "we." I'm guilty of this too. But I am trying to work on it regularly, because I do not want to be that person.
when i am focused on someone else's life and try to make it fit into the mold that has been created for my life, i find so many things wrong with it. and I spend my time trying to find people who affirm that where I'm at in my journey is the "right place to be"
example:
As many of you know, (and the rest of you will soon find out)
Growing up I never went to movie theaters, because my parents thought there were better uses of our time and money. As I got older, I got to the point where I could make that decision for myself. I still chose not to go. This was due to a little thing between me and God. My friends were baffled by it. Not only baffled, though, but downright upset that I wouldn't go. They kept trying to ask me if I thought going to the movies was evil or if i looked down on them for going. I had one person ask the reason and when I said, "because God told me not to." he said, "But...God wouldn't ask you to do something like that."
right. cuz you have a party line going on me and God's conversations.
For a long time i resented it. I thought everyone should avoid movie theaters because I was. Then God was like, Suzy movies aren't sinful. You aren't wrong for not going, they aren't necessarily wrong for going. I called you to this because of things I want to teach you. Stop trying to make them walk a journey i custom made for YOU.
so now I still do not frequent movie theaters. But i also do not look down on those who go. I do not expect them to have the same convictions I do. Because God has THEM on a custom-made journey that might not exclude movies...but something else instead.
I guess all of this was to say, we (in general) tend to feel like holding a belief or standard for our self before God isn't good enough. Everyone else has to believe it or live like it too.
I'm not saying there aren't black and white truths (foundational Biblical truths are unwavering and cannot be compromised on). I am saying that we fill in the blanks in the Bible with what WE think is the proper way to live and expect everyone to be not only on the same page, but on the same exact letter as us.
Too bad God had way too much creativity and love to give us personalities and free will. That combination will make for no two journeys to look the same. And only he knows my heart and your heart and the intentions, brokenness, experiences, hopes, dreams and failures that heart has been through. I cannot possibly begin to judge something so intricate, delicate and beyond my scope.
When I'm looking at you picking flowers on your life-journey while I'm trudging through a little mud, I become ungrateful and complain and question God why you just get things handed to you. But if my eyes are fixed on Him, I'll get the tools I need to help me through the mud and into my own flower field beyond it. Because little do I know that you had just been through quicksand and almost died and you deserve those flowers.
so my goal is to focus on my own journey. because there are enough complexities with my own that I have no real time or energy (not to mention business) nit-picking others'.
the thoughts above are assuming we all at least strive to be true journeyers.
allow me to give you my definition of a journeyer or one who journey's (forgive my pronoun-antecedent agreement issues):
A journeyer does not get stuck in a rut of a mundane life. they live everything intentionally and purposefully. they look at their faults and weaknesses and seek God and the Holy Spirit as means to change, grow and mature. they are willing to talk and be open, and more importantly, to listen. Not only to God, but to their accountability partner, mentor, pastor, spouse... A journeyer isn't one who doesn't have issues. In fact, the exact opposite. they own up to their issues. and make a commitment to change them and learn from them. they do not judge others for being at a different place emotionally, spiritually, physically or mentally.
This is a journeyer.
and then people try to be different and against the norms. and they end up banding together in being different. because no one can stand alone. it is all about looking around and making yourself feel better because you're not the only one. being the only one who holds one opinion is lonely.
but this is just for the trivial things, right?
wrong.
because we don't stop with opinions on music or actors or food.
we do this with people's lives, standards, character, beliefs etc...
"Tattoos are wrong no matter who you are."
or
"Well if I don't believe dancing is right, then it isn't right for anyone."
or
"Anyone who attends that event isn't a Christian."
or
"She isn't raising her children right."
And in these cases, it isn't about standing alone or being right, it is about understanding the journey and being a journeyer.
Maybe the tattoo came from a Jewish Prison camp during WWII.
Maybe dance is a form of worship and art for someone.
Maybe the person attending that questionable event is struggling to find their identity in Christ and being there will cause them to re-evaluate.
Maybe she was beaten and abused and has no way of knowing how to raise children right.
who knows?
anybody who has spent any amount of time having a relatively deep conversation with me knows one of the principles I stand by is this:
Everyone is on a journey. No two journeys look the same. Since only you and God know exactly where you're at in your journey, I cannot possibly judge you for not being at the same place I am at.
but we do it. notice I said "we." I'm guilty of this too. But I am trying to work on it regularly, because I do not want to be that person.
when i am focused on someone else's life and try to make it fit into the mold that has been created for my life, i find so many things wrong with it. and I spend my time trying to find people who affirm that where I'm at in my journey is the "right place to be"
example:
As many of you know, (and the rest of you will soon find out)
Growing up I never went to movie theaters, because my parents thought there were better uses of our time and money. As I got older, I got to the point where I could make that decision for myself. I still chose not to go. This was due to a little thing between me and God. My friends were baffled by it. Not only baffled, though, but downright upset that I wouldn't go. They kept trying to ask me if I thought going to the movies was evil or if i looked down on them for going. I had one person ask the reason and when I said, "because God told me not to." he said, "But...God wouldn't ask you to do something like that."
right. cuz you have a party line going on me and God's conversations.
For a long time i resented it. I thought everyone should avoid movie theaters because I was. Then God was like, Suzy movies aren't sinful. You aren't wrong for not going, they aren't necessarily wrong for going. I called you to this because of things I want to teach you. Stop trying to make them walk a journey i custom made for YOU.
so now I still do not frequent movie theaters. But i also do not look down on those who go. I do not expect them to have the same convictions I do. Because God has THEM on a custom-made journey that might not exclude movies...but something else instead.
I guess all of this was to say, we (in general) tend to feel like holding a belief or standard for our self before God isn't good enough. Everyone else has to believe it or live like it too.
I'm not saying there aren't black and white truths (foundational Biblical truths are unwavering and cannot be compromised on). I am saying that we fill in the blanks in the Bible with what WE think is the proper way to live and expect everyone to be not only on the same page, but on the same exact letter as us.
Too bad God had way too much creativity and love to give us personalities and free will. That combination will make for no two journeys to look the same. And only he knows my heart and your heart and the intentions, brokenness, experiences, hopes, dreams and failures that heart has been through. I cannot possibly begin to judge something so intricate, delicate and beyond my scope.
When I'm looking at you picking flowers on your life-journey while I'm trudging through a little mud, I become ungrateful and complain and question God why you just get things handed to you. But if my eyes are fixed on Him, I'll get the tools I need to help me through the mud and into my own flower field beyond it. Because little do I know that you had just been through quicksand and almost died and you deserve those flowers.
so my goal is to focus on my own journey. because there are enough complexities with my own that I have no real time or energy (not to mention business) nit-picking others'.
the thoughts above are assuming we all at least strive to be true journeyers.
allow me to give you my definition of a journeyer or one who journey's (forgive my pronoun-antecedent agreement issues):
A journeyer does not get stuck in a rut of a mundane life. they live everything intentionally and purposefully. they look at their faults and weaknesses and seek God and the Holy Spirit as means to change, grow and mature. they are willing to talk and be open, and more importantly, to listen. Not only to God, but to their accountability partner, mentor, pastor, spouse... A journeyer isn't one who doesn't have issues. In fact, the exact opposite. they own up to their issues. and make a commitment to change them and learn from them. they do not judge others for being at a different place emotionally, spiritually, physically or mentally.
This is a journeyer.
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