for such a time as this.

I used to think of myself as a non-complaining type of person. I mean, my life is basically great. There is no legitimate reason I should complain about anything. But then at work, I realized that I vocalized a lot of complainings about annoyances. And one night I apologized to a co-worker and said, "You know, I'm so sorry...I'm being super complain-y, huh." To which he replied, "actually...you complain a lot."

we were brutally honest friends...

Ok, so I complain. Mainly about a certain point in life I'm at at any given time. Like right now. this awful, uncertain, never-ending (or so it seems) time of transition I'm in. I find myself complaining a lot (mainly to myself as I lay in bed, because i don't have a life. haha just kidding). But I wonder what I'm doing here, and why am I not somewhere else where I could be more useful.

Then tonight, I read Esther.

Man, that girl was a super-star. But she did have a pretty sticky situation.
In short, she was a young virgin in a foreign land that wasn't too welcoming to her people. she ended up becoming part of a competition the king set up to find a new queen (the last one was kicked out because she refused to be paraded in front of a drunk king and his drunk princes-being smart has its drawbacks). this king was volatile, powerful, obnoxious, inappropriate, and border-line bi-polar. But he liked Esther. Because she was beautiful and sweet and bold and overall amazing. Her relative, Mordecai initiated this whole thing up, because he was going to utilize her position to help save her people from destruction.

Basically, he says, "If you keep quiet at a time like this, deliverance and relief for the Jews will arise from some other place, but you and your relatives will die. Who knows if perhaps you were made queen for just such a time as this?” (esther 4:14)

And she takes this situation seriously, does some crazy bold things and ends up saving her people. (you really should go read it...fantastic story)

That phrase though, echoes through my head...

...for such a time as this.

Maybe God knows what he's doing.
Maybe this is exactly where I'm supposed to be.
Maybe there is a reason I'm here.
Maybe I'll be able to see that reason, maybe not.

But what I do know, is that where I'm at in life is never a mistake. I want to be bold, and intentional in each season of my life, no matter where I'm placed. Even if it looks dim and never-ending and as if I have no real purpose.

Because God will get his work done, with or without me. That much is clear by his MO. but why not be open and willing to be used by him in this place and time where he has put me. I doubt I'll be saving any nations from destruction...but hey, I'll settle for encouraging a stranger on a bus or loving on a kid I'm babysitting.

look at your own life. wonder why you're here? does what is ahead of you seem daunting or cause feelings of fear to grip you? do you feel unworthy or unusable? do you wonder if God even knows you exist?

...for such a time as this, you are here. take courage. press onward. whether it seems big or small in your eyes, rest assured that in God's economy, things work a little different. the "smallest" thing may be the final detail that works into a plan much larger than we could ever imagine. We won't understand it til Glory (and even then, we probably won't care).

So take heart. there's a reason you are where you are, and are doing what you're doing. seek God in all that you do, and he'll direct your path to figuring out what it is.