Saturday, July 03, 2010

airplanes ARE shooting stars...

...in Los Angeles, anyways. and boy, I could really use a wish right now.

Not sure what i'd wish for. But it would be something amazing. like a cleansing mud bath. or a pile of pre-peeled kiwis. or perhaps a cute baby to snuggle with. (speaking of babies, and on a strange side-note, I had a dream where i had triplets. it was...like a beautiful nightmare.)

Anyways. my night: It is 12:30 am. I am home alone, as my parents are on a nice 4th of July weekend getaway. (go them.) I can't wait to get old(er) and be married to the same person for like a score and eight years and go away on vacations together. so cute.
The kids at work who found out I had the house to myself were about to invite themselves over for a BYOP. (bring your own party. its much more inclusive than a BYOB). I told them the reason my parentals let me stay alone is because they trust me not to have a party. duh.

but point is, i'm alone. I almost made this my facebook status, but I realized that facebook is easier stalked than blogs. and by the time a creeper stalks my blog, figures out where I live and comes to attack me, my parents will be home. that is my logic. it may be faulty.

But be not afraid...i know self-defense. =)

My mistake was watching a CSI: Las Vegas about a poor girl who got murdered in her home by a vengeful ex-lover. Now i know that all my ex's live in texas...but still it made my observation detectors go on slight overdrive. (btw, that ex's thing was a quote from a country song...i have no vengeful ex-lovers. that i know of.)
In any case...every creak of the floorboards, shake of the dog collar and headlight of a passing car is catching my attention. I am doing little checks around the house. I also looked around the room and thought of how it might look to a CSI investigating my murder. I thought of all the things they might say.

"there is a take-out box of half eaten food from...mimi's cafe."
"I found an employee card with that name on it in her front left shirt pocket...she must have just come home from work."
"neighbors said a car was missing from their driveway...her parents must be gone for the holiday weekend."
"purse still on the sofa with wallet inside...this wasn't a robbery."
"half-written blog describing her happy life...poor girl."
"oh and she was watching CSI...and she didn't see this coming? perfect."

I just admitted to my mom this morning, in fact, that i am not a scared person. and I'm not. I'm just being cautious. After all, i will go to sleep perfectly happy tonight. and if i'm attacked, well then i'll be seeing my Lord and Savior a little sooner than expected.

which might not be a bad thing.

*sigh*

Now that i've scared me AND you...I think i'll go to bed. i figure if i'm asleep i won't hear anyone coming. its the suspense that kills me. no pun intended. I'm just glad my life doesn't have a narrator or mood music. it'd really freak me out.

Maybe I should have had a party. a tame one. with lemonade and nachos. Just so that I wouldn't be alone.

Wait. I'm NOT alone! now there is a comforting feeling.
I have no need to be afraid.
no matter where i go. where i sit, lie down, what I think, whatever may happen to me...NONE of it escapes Him. He is not caught off guard by intruders. He has me protected. and i can lie down and sleep in peace tonight...knowing that it is Him alone that allows me to do it in safety.

Now THERE is a promise I can stand on.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

So the funny thing, Suzy, is that when I was about your age I was in a similar situation with parents gone, home alone, etc. I knew that if I had another human, no matter how small, with me, I wouldn't feel so alone, so you came over for a slumber party, and you must have been 2 or 3 at a time. We got along fine until the earthquake hit in the middle of the night. You slept through it; I did not. Ahh, memories.

Obviously I learned to be alone, as I went on to live alone for 9 years or so! :-)
Carol

heysoos said...

oh wow!! i don't think i have ever heard that story! that's so great! haha. Yeah I think I could live alone...i just can't think about it too much =)