Agape

Hey Folks!  

I admit, when I'm not inspired to write anything, I tend to just not blog, period.  It is lame, I know.  I mean what if I was a real celebrity!  what if my income depended on it?  Good thing it doesn't.  

But hey, today I'm inspired.  And honestly, I just need to sit down and start typing, and usually things flow.

I titled this post Agape because of what inspired me to write today.  After a super delicious dinner last night (chicken ciabatta sandwiches with goat cheese and caramelized onions--I was pretty proud of that one), Ben and I sat in the living room to read our book together.  It is called:  Love, The Greatest Thing in The World. 

The first part of it is a little essay written by Henry Drummond in the late 1800s about 1 Corinthians 13.  I'll admit, it was not the easiest read.  The guy was like CS Lewis.  No word is wasted.  One sentence holds so many nuances and carries much weight.  *sigh*

But the rest of the book is written by a man further down the Drummond line named Lewis.  He proceeded to expound and expand on Henry's writing to make it easier to understand and unpack his loaded paragraphs.  

Last night we were reading about Agape love.  And the section quoted another man named Nygren and said: 

God does not love that which is already in itself worthy of love, but on the contrary, that which in itself has no worth acquires worth just by becoming the object of God's love.  Agape has nothing to do with the kind of love that depends on the recognition of a valuable quality in its object; Agape does not recognise value, but creates it.  Agape loves, and imparts value by loving.  The man who is loved by God has no value in himself; what gives him value is precisely the fact that God loves him.  Agape is a value-creating principle. 

Wow.  Go back and read that again.  Seriously.  That explains how we had no worth until God loved us.  And we love him, because he first loved us.  

Lewis Drummond said later in the section:  We must realize that love is not God; God is love.  He is a Person, not a principle, who personally loves us.  

I am both relieved and in awe that the Agape love of God has made me worthy.  This kind of Agape love is experiential.

I don't even know how this fits into my life fully.  I don't know how to have agape love and not the self-serving love of Eros (which isn't just sexual love, by the way...the book tells how it is, at its core, merely egocentric).  How many of us love because it makes us feel good or gives us something in return.  Strings attached.  Being a Christian is about experiencing, knowing and living this agape love, which is value-creating.

What a high calling. 

Lewis Drummond also says that this kind of love "far exceeds mere 'warm and fuzzy' sentimental feelings about God and ourselves."

He points out that Paul said it best in his prayer for the Ephesians (3:17-19)

"So that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith;  and that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth and to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you  may be filled up to all the fullness of God."

Amen.

Now on to some lighter newsy stuff

I have been looking for jobs for a while now...attempting to get back into working with troubled kids.  Every job I've applied for hasn't panned out.  The other morning (Tuesday), I was browsing random jobs online, applying for anyone that looked remotely up my alley.  I found one where the tagline said, "Want to work with a great team to help make a difference in kids' lives??  Apply today!"  There wasn't too much more information on the website than that, but I applied anyway...what could it hurt?  

That afternoon I got a phone call from their office and the lady said they got my application and wanted to set up an interview.  She said she knew it was short notice, but could I come in the next afternoon?  

Wow. talk about neat. 

So I made the appointment. 

Insert a little something about myself:  I hate being put on the spot for answers.  Tests, interviews, the testimony before my baptism....stuff like that.  I know what I know.  I know it well.  I can articulate it quite nicely....on my own time, in my own way, without a date set. 

I wish getting a job worked this way:  you are discovered in your element doing what you do best, without the pressure to be what they want/need you to be and without having to try to sell yourself.  (not in a nasty way, but in a "I'm the best fit for your job opening" kind of way...which i am NOT good at).

Anyway, went in for the interview, and basically i love the concept of the job.  Exactly what I've been looking for.  It was a preliminary interview, just a get-to-know-you type thing, where they ask a few questions, see how you answer them and decide if they want to proceed further.  

I felt confident.  Until they said that if they choose me as a candidate to proceed, they will have a few more extensive interviews.  

i got sick to my stomach. and it lasted all afternoon. 

So as long as I don't think about what comes next, I'm great!  it looks promising.  They are launching a new program and are hiring all new people as far as I know, so that ups the chances of me getting a job, right? 

Anyway, say a prayer if you think of it.  I have to keep reminding myself that if this job is for me, God will make my paths straight and open the right doors.  That is a comforting feeling...except for when my heart doubts that truth at times when I think I could have said something better or more complete or not laughed nervously or shook his hand with my sweaty palms.  

I shall post a post next about family vacation.  with pictures. =)

au revoir.