There are so many things to talk about and update on that I considered writing two. But that's dumb. So I shall write one and it will just be long. You ready? Good.
As always, we'll begin with the deeper things and end on a lighter, picture-filled note. Winter here in Minnesota has held some wonderful things as well as a handful of new and not-as-wonderful experiences. But being engaged to a winter-lover definitely helps. Technically I did move here in January, so I did experience cold on the front end of my life here. But summer is a sneaky lil' guy cuz it comes right in and makes you forget things like snow, coats, and bone-chilling days. so here I am, totally blind-sided again by it all. I keep waking up and looking out my window and wondering if today I don't have to wear a million layers. But it just keeps going. We did have an epic snow-fall last week which was SO beautiful and totally helped make winter worth it (pics of that to come).
All of that to say, it is a season (literally and figuratively) of new things for me. One of the new changes impacted me a lot last weekend...more than it has in all my 11 months of being here. Back in September of last year, when I first decided to move here, I wrote a post called heartbreak. It articulated some tough things I anticipated feeling when I moved away from my church family. This past year here in Minneapolis has held a lot of firsts of missing things with Altadena after being there for 22 years...but I think it was all with the mindset that I would return to CA. Now that I'm getting married and settling down here more permanently, the firsts are also establishing lots of lasts as well that I didn't plan on. One of which is the Sunday School Christmas Program.
The Christmas Program in Altadena was probably one of my favorite times of year growing up. Pieces, songs, walking in to "Oh Come All Ye Faithful" EVERY year, walking out on "Angels We have Heard on High," Grammy's peanut butter balls, Chrystol's Rosettes, gift exchanges between teachers and students, Salvation Army gift wrapping, caroling at the Fair Oaks nursing homes (shudder) and getting a new outfit for it all each year. I can remember the year that Jason, Theresa and Lindsey were practicing their parts and I got to say a piece with them and I was so excited to be one of the older kids. I can remember Paula singing a solo part in "What Child is This." I can remember Justin reading an epic Max Lucado story....the memories keep rushing to my mind.
Well this year, as I saw watching these kids here in Minneapolis sing their songs in front of church, all I could picture were the faces of kids two thousand miles away. Cody and Caidan singing as loud as they could, Seth waxing eloquent with his piece, Caeleigh being the very picture of lady-like sweetness...and the tears fell. In fact, they started at the beginning of the program and didn't stop...even as us teachers joined the kids to sing a song. I didn't know why...i just know it hurt. I don't want to take away from what these kids were doing and how great it was....it was just different. and my heart wasn't ready for it.
afterward, as everyone sat around eating and talking and laughing, I slipped downstairs to call into Altadena and listen to their program. Ben came down and sat with me as I cried. I didn't tell him at first what was bothering me...but he came up with it pretty quick on his own. (the guy knows me well, what can i say?)
I listened to familiar voices say pieces, sing songs...my dad prayed for each kid by name...and my tears kept falling.
In the moments that followed that, i realized that there was an aspect of my mourning that hadn't happened yet. My heart needed to catch up to where my mind, plans and life was headed. It was actually a very healing day and much needed. I'm also grateful to have Ben, who will just listen to me talk, let me cry and give me a hug.
I am learning to let God hold those memories and the heart connections I have to the past. I have to trust that he'll keep them safe and bring them back around if/when He wants to. I have to trust that he has me here for a reason and that I will not miss out on any good thing he has for me. *sigh* But boy, is it hard.
Ok...on to pictures =)
This is Sierra and Saffron. Basically Sierra holds a stick in her mouth while Saffron tries to be all tough and pull it away from her. It both annoys and amuses Sierra.
This is my newest favorite lunch. Toasted ciabatta with cream cheese and cucumbers with some yummy spices, Salt and vinegar chips and fancy-looking drink out of a wine glass (it makes me feel grown up to drink out of a wine glass). Mmmm so good.
Then came the snow!!!
My street
Joe (Ben's brother) and his friend Adrian were so sweet to clear a path to and around Simon after church! Well...it was sweet until they pelted me with snowballs as I tried to get in!
Sierra's half-husky side totally came out in the snow! She absolutely LOVED it!
(awesome looking snow shoveler in the background IS Ben. he loves shoveling snow. that is not sarcastic.)
Sierra and Nan running around
If you throw snowballs to Sierra, she'll chase them and then dig her head in the snow where they land to try to look for them when they disappear.
Ok, ok so maybe snow isn't too bad after all =)
holding a snowball in her mouth.
Karlina likes to wear mommy's boots around.
Playing at the baseball diamond in the park across the street.
Christmas cookie fun with my friends!
Crystal, Jenn and Tanya
Michelle and Andrea
This guy was supposed to have two eyes...but the frosting was a little runny and it sort of flowed into one. I call him: Christmas Cyclops.
We have lots of fun together! I so appreciate these girls in my life!
She looks so uncomfortable, but she's having lots of fun!
Mr. Ender loves swinging too. Just can't wipe the grin off that face!
Karlina discovered hand dryers at the mall the other day. She used to be kind of scared of them...then she realized it feels like a windstorm if you stand UNDER them! We definitely stood in the bathroom 5-10 extra minutes while she played under them.
Mall of America has a huge Lego store and outside is a little play place for kids. Ender is standing up all by himself and as long as he's near something will play standing up!
Phalen Park does a Christmas light display where you drive through and they have various themes and such. Really pretty!
 | |||
| ...and to all a good night =) |
Thanks for joining me again for a snippet of my life! This afternoon (in just a few hours actually!) Ben and I are headed to California for the Klotzle Christmas. I'm SO excited! Not only to be going to CA, but to be going with Ben and that I get to see all my extended family! and no work for TWO WEEKS! wooohooo!! =)
I'll take lots of pictures and maybe update while I'm there!
if not, may the peace of God rest in your hearts as you re-discover and celebrate the gift he gave to us through the birth of Jesus.
3 comments:
Suzy,
I hear you with the homesickness that comes with missing holiday traditions. I remember a year after I got married and moved to IL when my mom called me from the mountain on Easter morning to have me listen to everyone singing. It did NOT have the desired effect, unless the desired effect was to get me homesick.
Anyway, I get it. I will say, though, that after the first year or so it gets easier as you begin to embrace the new location's traditions as your own. Oddly enough, these will start to worm their way into your heart and as you get to know these new families more and more, their children's voices will be what makes you smile. It's a bittersweet thing; part of us holds so tightly to our memories and we don't want to lose that, but as you're learning, life does go on, things change, and that will be okay. You do have the advantage of a smaller church. That closeness with families will happen much faster than it would in a big church. And remember, Jim is there as the "person who knew you when," something that I never knew was important until I became surrounded by people who only have known me as Mrs. Blunier. Whenever Fred and Nancy would visit it was such a breath of fresh air. So allow yourself to mourn a bit for the life that you're leaving behind, but embrace the new traditions you'll find. And by all means, make some of your own. And if necessary, find a similar nursing home to the lovely ones we went to sing at in Altadena (I share your shudder there.) :-) Merry Christmas! Have a great time in California!
The snowstorm we had was horrible! Especially in Saint Paul, where the streets don't get plowed very well.
We missed you too. Kali was the only girl voice for the grad song. Loved your dads prayer. Looking forward to seeing you and Ben.
Shayna
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